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IDENTITY
This concentration features a plain little dude with no clearly defined features. The simplicity of the character emphasizes how we all start in the world as blobs, completely malleable in endless aspects and layers that transform and grow as we build our identities. This chain of pieces, in particular, express different stages of working through queer identity.
Please note: the LGBTQ+ experience is not the same for everyone. These pieces do not even scratch the surface of all the possible paths the journey can go. These pieces and writing merely convey my personal knowledge and experience.
The little dude’s name is Spec, like spectrum. All that develops in people’s individual identities are a result of intermixing and discovering spectrums. I find this to be the reason infinite diversity is possible, and endlessly beautiful.
Ft. Spec
Gender
Gender dysphoria conjures disabling and discouraging internal conflict and distress. It is a disconnection between the way one mentally and emotionally identifies versus their perceived reality.
Being trans masculine/feminine does not automatically shove an individual's identity to the opposite end of the binary.
Being nonbinary does not automatically mean an individual prefers they/them pronouns.
Self-identification and self-representation are not required to conform to sociocultural standards of masculinity, femininity, androgyny, or lack thereof.
Your standard for gender is one of the countless personal truths you can and should define, by your own terms, and by what you are comfortable with.
Piece caption:
While variances in sexuality are widely discussed, the gender spectrum remains neglected from being acknowledged. This causes navigating one's gender identity to be very difficult and confusing when questions arise from dysphoric experiences.
The significance of the colors pulls from the transgender, genderqueer, and nonbinary flags. Pink, feminine identities. Blue, masculine identities. Yellow and green, nonbinary identities. Purple, androgynous and various degrees of queer identities. Varying degrees of grays, connecting to white and black colors used for multigender identities and genderless identities.
This piece of queer identity can be divided further into romantic attraction and sexual attraction. For example, someone who identifies as asexual can also be biromantic. Lacking sexual attraction, doesn't correlate with disabled romantic attraction.
Multigender attraction requires no uniformity or balance. You can have a tendency toward a particular gender. Your label is valid. You may have yet to experience a relation with a certain gender. Your label is valid
Lack of or very minimal attraction is a possibility. Asexuality is a spectrum in itself. Your label is valid.
A lack of a fitting label is valid. Labels overlap, have odd specificities, and sometimes just one little detail throws off the accuracy for self-application. Labels will get worn, changes, and overlooked, and that's okay. Take your time, the labels aren't going anywhere.
Piece caption:
The list of possible identities of attraction goes on and on. It takes time to find the words that properly match what one feels.
The hearts contain patterns from some, not all, pride flags. In hand, pansexual-attraction regardless of gender. From left to right overhead: Demisexual-sexual attraction only when a strong emotional connection is present. Aromantic-lack of romantic attraction. Bisexual-attraction to two or more genders. Asexual-lack of sexual attraction. Under asexual, polysexual-attraction to many genders.
Love
Questioning
Labels are restricting, but simultaneously liberating when one fits just right. The confusion that accompanies the process of pairing feelings with the right terms to convey them is a roller coaster no one asks for.
The acronym of LGBTQ+ can be extended into LGBTTQQIAAP, and the second Q represents the Questioning category of the community. It's okay to be questioning for however long you need. It's okay to come back to questioning even after you thought you established yourself to a term. It's okay to be questioning and reach the conclusion you are cisgender/straight.
Thoughts and feelings are valid, regardless of how prevalent or faint they may be.
No grasp on a concrete term, or terms, to identify with is welcome. Exploring and experimenting is welcome. Confusion is welcome. Questioning is welcome.
Piece caption:
The incorporation of questioning in the community is not often spoken about despite how common it is.
We assemble ourselves piece by piece as we find what composes our essence. Pieces don't always fit together the way we anticipate or would prefer them to, and it's a process that involves numerous detours and revisions.
LGBTTQQIAAP: Lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, transsexual, queer, questioning, intersex, asexual, ally, pansexual.
Evidently, even this does not encompass all identities.
The closet is simultaneously a haven and a realm of torture. On one hand, it is a safe place to keep yourself from everyone if you can't/don't want to come out. On the other, it grows into a cage that inhibits your authentic self to just be.
"Coming out of the closet", what a wonderful phrase. According to an article by Akira Orent, this signature of the community was not commonly used until the 1960's and originates from two separate sayings. "Coming out" initially referred to one's initial presentation to society. "The closet" takes from "skeleton in the closet", skeletons being synonymous with secrets and closets usually thought of as a place of privacy.
The weight of remaining closeted varies per person. Unless you know they would be okay with you clarifying their identity to another person, please try not to speak on their behalf without permission, even with good intentions.
From discrimination, to persecution, to fear, to danger, or simply not feeling ready to or wanting to, the reasons we remain hidden away are justified.
Piece caption:
It is not uncommon for there to be a period of time of self-denial and neglecting
acknowledgment of what we know is true to ourselves.
The flags present in the background are those of which I personally identify with:
Top left: Genderqueer. Top right: Pan. Middle: Nonbinary .Bottom: Universal rainbow flag icon
Closet
When LGBTQ+ individuals are a topic of discussion, usually it pertains to discrimination, oppression, and, overwhelmingly, mental health and suicide.
Compared to older times, there is far more acceptance, realization, and representation of LGBTQ+. The gay community is thriving, but it still endures hate and rejection from not only those judging from the outside, but those within the community as well.
Toxicity arises in the community due to individuals who identify as queer, but only accept others on their terms of what they consider legitimate and reasonable. For instance, racism, transphobia, and biphobia tend to be addressed, but are not the limit. Racism, because you can only be one minority at a time, apparently. Transphobia, because sexuality is a spectrum and can change but gender is not and cannot, apparently. Biphobia, because you're either too gay or not gay enough, apparently.
Due to the internal discrimination that occurs, some are not able to feel belonging or safety within a group with which they belong.
Piece caption:
Black dogs are a symbol associated with depression. As a result of learning this, I depict mental health through the imagery of black "dogs".
The quotes around the word serve the purpose of highlighting that mental health is perceived by and impacts every individual differently.
The struggle to be accepted outside and inside the queer community takes a great mental toll on those who are simply trying to understand themselves.